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Like most literate netizens, I keep an eye on the news. Mostly, it’s bad. Mostly, though, it’s about the idiots in Washington finding new ways not to get useful things done, wasting our money on useless, pointless wars, and the continuing whitewash of the economic firestorm most of us are enduring. All these things are terrible, but I’m kind of inured to them. I see them every day, so I have a tendency to just grumble and carry on.

This week, I got to watch the people be stupid. Lots of them.

There was this young lady, wanted to take her date, female date, to the high school prom at Itawamba Agricultural High School in Fulton, Mississippi. Rather than do the right thing, obviously just let her and her date go, or face an (entirely righteous) beat-down from the ACLU, they canceled the prom. For everyone. Ok. I guess those things they say about the south are still true. You stupid, bigoted, idiots. You know that light you hope to see when you die? That’s the sun shining through the water. Where the pond scum lives. Above you. Because you’re stupid, I’ll explain: You’re lower than pond scum. Get it? No, probably not.

So, this week, the Washington Post published a photo of two men kissing. Yawn. Right? Well, apparently not. They’re being buried in hate mail. Or hate male, as the case may be. Anyway, the readership has erupted in a moronic symphony of homophobic idiocy. Hey guys… you know, when two guys decide they’re interested in each other, do you understand it leaves more women in the field for us hetero guys? Well, ok, that’s not true. They only leave more women in the field for me. Because you… you’re too stupid for any worthwhile woman to want you anyway. Sorry I brought it up.

In theater of the absurd news, there’s this guy at the movies. Woman is talking on a cell phone. Being annoying. You know the type. Social sensitivity of a rock. So, he asks her to turn it off. Seem reasonable? I mean, she could do the right thing and shut it off, or she could just be rude and keep talking, like an idiot would do. Well, no. Turns out this incident is headed for option number three; boyfriend pulls out a meat thermometer and stabs the fellow who raised the objection in the neck. And two others who try to help him out after he was stabbed. Unbelievable, right? No. Fact. These people are so stupid, I don’t know how to describe the level of stupidity they have achieved. It just goes to prove that motor skills can exist without intelligence. I guess it really is time to stay home and just watch hi-def bluray movies.

In Bristol, Virginia, Keshia Canter, aged 19, handed an order of fast food out to a car in the drive-through. A woman in the back seat leaned forward and handed her a pamphlet, saying “Even though nothing is showing, you’re being ungodly, you make men want to be sinful.” The leaflet (“Women and Girls”) begins: “You may have been given this leaflet because of the way you are dressed. Have you thought about standing before the true and living God to be judged?” It goes on, and believe it or not, it gets stupider. Well, it’s Virginia, right? And we’ve already established that the south is having a problem not living up to its reputation of being almost unbelievably ignorant. Keshia, a credit to women of intelligence everywhere, responded: “Would you like any salt, pepper or ketchup”? Keshia, thanks for reminding me that not everyone is terminally stupid. I’m having a little problem with that right now.

Oh, and hey, this week the morons on the Ninth US Circuit Court of Appeals decided that “under God” belongs in the pledge of allegiance. Completely ignoring the constitutional provision that instructs the US government to make no law that establishes government support for any particular religion. Ignoring the fact that these words were shoehorned in during a particularly addled time in our history, right about the time McCarthy and his group of sicko apes were busily trying to pillory Americans for holding political opinions, when the “red scare” was all the rage, and before civil rights really got a fingernail in the crack. I mean, I’ve written about our courts before, and anyone who’s delved into my blog at any length knows I am far from impressed with the work they do, but really… this is just stupid. I guess they just felt they had to be on the same boat with those brain dead twerps from Mississippi.

Yeah, it’s been that kind of week. To which the usual fumbling of the ball of healthcare — either way — has been added (me, I’m for healthcare, but I’m simply observing here that the political process is about as intelligent as a bunch of monkeys arguing over a banana, and that the public propaganda machines behind it are even worse than the politics themselves.) And the wars. And the space program sliding into the doldrums.

It’s just been a very bad week. Who was it who said, “A person is smart. People are stupid.”? Hit the nail right on the head, right there.